Failure

I love singing.  There's no surprise there, I do musical things all the time.  But that does mean I'm completely confident in it or my voice.  In fact, I'm very very self-conscious about my singing.
I show my self-consciousness through my legs when I'm on stage.  There's a constant shake that happens in my calves, and I can never stop it.  Unfortunately this has a major effect on my performances.
Specifically, one time in 8th grade I was auditioning for a solo in chorus.  The song was Adele's "Rolling In The Deep" and I was so excited to be doing it.  And I stayed confident until the very moment I got up to audition.  The main reason for this I think (Besides of course my normal every day self-consciousness) was that one of my friends auditioned before me, and he was soooo good.  I could tell from the moment he started singing that he was gonna get the part.  I could see it on the directors face, and that's what hurt me the most; knowing that I didn't even have a real chance to prove myself.  So when I got up there my legs immediately started shaking and I could barely hit any of the notes.  I was so off key that it felt like someone had actually taken the key and shoved it down my throat.  I felt so defeated and low that I started to cry.  Not a lot, just the type of crying where your face gets all red and you can feel your eyes puffing up. 
Anyways, I didn't get the solo.  But the sad part is that it didn't even matter to me that I didn't get the part, the real failure for me, as an 8th grader, was that I even got up there.


http://musicians.about.com/od/LifeasaMusician/ht/How-To-Deal-With-Stage-Fright.htm